My Friday..............

Gas for 300 miles - $40

Parking - $11

Seeing Watts being found guilty - PRICELESS

I was just going to bed on Thursday night when I decided to check my email. There was a email from Corey Mitchell informing me that they had gave the Gloria Steele murder case over to the jury and I replied I would leave in the morning for Kalamazoo, Mich which is 140 miles west of where I live. I called off work with a little hesitation due to the fact that I was off on Monday and the past Friday, but it didn't matter since there would be NO way I would miss not being there to show all of our collective support for the Steele family when the verdict was read.

Again I had trouble sleeping due to bad dreams which has plagued me for the past week since the trial started. I awoke with a knot in my stomach knowing of the drive and what the day had to hold due to the fact that I had already lived through this once before. So I showered and jumped in the car and headed west for the Kalamazoo Courthouse. I found myself driving in a urgent fashion just to make my destination by the 9am court time. as I closed in on Kalamazoo i called the Kalamazoo Prosecutor, Scott Brower, and let him know that I was in the area and would be at the courtroom soon. I made it there @ 8:55 and there was no one in the court room but 2 camera crews from the local news stations, so I sat in the back of the courtroom for a few just to gather my thoughts and to settle my nerves from the last 2 anxious hours. After a few minutes of sitting there I asked them if they were the only one's covering the Watts trial and they both acknowledged that they were. I replied that it was a damn shame that we have America's worst serial killer on trial and all it can muster is the local news, with no disrespect to them, but just it was a sad affirmation of how lucky Watts is when it came to going unnoticed. Since we were the only folks in the court room we found our selves making small talk about the progress of the case and then finally one of the news reporters, Nicole Misencik asked me my involvement in the case. I then explained who I was and them being reporters, that started the questions, which then lead into an interview. But what I found during this interview was how I described certain aspects of the more diabolical parts of Watt's evil I could see in the eyes of Nicole how with every word of mine it seemed to effect her. Again just another example how through out this I have discovered that there is so much truth to the saying that the "eyes are the widow to the soul. I've learned this from my now new experience with Nicole and from the way I saw the pain and emotional anguish in Sandra Roslynn's, (Watts surviving, Windsor Canada's victims) eyes when I met her in the courtroom at the Dutcher trial. But the most telling one was on that cold winter night 28 years ago when I looked into the eyes of a cold blooded killer and saw the darkest evil, a soul could possess. This interview like all the rest that I've done without exception always find be loosing it during it when I speak of all the pain and suffering this animal has brought down on so many undeserving people. After it was done our small talk turned into chatter about their jobs and such. Then a court officer came in and informed us that the jury had went to lunch and will resume deliberations at 1pm. The news crews left for lunch and after a minute I went looking for the same in this unfamiliar town.

After spotting a Burger King about a mile from the court house I decided to walk to it for not only a time killer but also a time to reflect about how much I've involved myself and family into this circus with a serial killer. Did I think it out thoroughly? Did I put my family in any real danger from Watt's reaching out to do them any harm? These are questions that have also ate at me since this has all started. But I feel I jumped on a train that has no real end to it and my family are passengers who were not asked to join but were taken anyway. There's no backing out now, I have to see this through, to where I'm not sure but I think when it's done I will know. I ate my lunch as I watched all the others in the lobby carry on with their lives and just wanted to scream out just to release all the pressure that was swirling around in my head. I noticed in my bag that they had for some reason put a happy meal toy in there, I really have no use for it and I noticed a little girl happily playing with the one she just had handed to her by her mother. So I gathered my stuff and walked up to them and offered the little girl the toy I had in my hand. She looked at her Mom for approval, her Mom nodded yes and the little girl smiled, snatched it from my hand and instantly began playing with it. Her Mom looked at me smiling as I walked away. It felt good to go back to normal mode for that quick second because I knew my walk back was taking me back to hell.

As I entered entered the hallway that led to the courtroom I noticed the two news crews out in the hall. They said they had been instructed that the court was going to use the room for "Show cause" hearings until the jury reached a verdict and then they would clear the courtroom and they would be let back in. At that moment I received a call for the Prosecutor and he wanted to know if I was still there and if so he would like to meet with me. I told him I was in the courthouse and he said he'd be down to meet me. After a few minutes Scott Bower emerged from the 2 swinging doors that had "Court Officials Only" on them. I had never met Scott before but he walked right up to me with his hand extended. "Joe Foy, I'm Scott Bower, Glad to finally meet you. I recognize you from TV. Thank you for coming out." he said. I then explained that I was there to show support for the Steele Family and also as a representative for all the other victims families who were unable to be there. We as a group wanted to know that they were not alone in this and that we were all right there with them.. He nodded as he said he understood. I then asked if the Steele family was in the building and if it was possible to see them and express our feelings. He said he would see and would come back in a little bit. I watched as he made his way back through the restricted door and there I was again to wait. After awhile the doors swung open and Scott gestured me to follow him, as I reached him he said he had talked to the Steel family and they were glad I had made it and wanted to meet me. So as we walked down the hallways that snaked through the building I could feel the tension build in me with every step I took. A couple of times I could feel my eyes swell with tears and my throat knot up as I realized that I was about to meet another family that Watt's had destroyed. He led me into a small room lined with chairs filled with folks from varying ages from young to old, all who loved Gloria Steele. I was introduced to each and everyone of them and I shook each hand or was offered a hug. I met her Mom, Daughter and her Father, Aunts, Nieces and Gloria's Granddaughter. All expressed thanks for what I had done. I then offered them my sincere condolences and as I did the throat tightened up and the tears started to flow as I told them that for them not to feel they were alone in this and that there were prayers coming from all parts of this country for them. From Boston to California, from Canada to Texas and I was there to show them support for all of us who were effected by this animal. I did this as I tried to control the outburst of emotion that was trying to fight it's way out of me. I gained some type of control as I told them it was all in Gods hands and God was totally on our side so it was all going to work out. They all nodded in agreement and thanked me for being there. Her family was so nice and Gloria's daughter was very beautiful and I'm sure Gloria is so proud of the woman she has become and the granddaughter she has. I left the room and back out in the lobby and sought out a quite place to breakdown for the reason of why I did this after I've met so many of the victims families, I know how he killed each of their loved ones, without any remorse or feeling what so ever, no matter the manner . After I gathered myself I went back in the lobby to wait, the clock was now ticking towards 5 o clock where it would have to held over the weekend till Monday and I started to pray that he please not make them, us have to wait and stress all that time to wait for this verdict that all of us in our hearts know what it should be....GUILTY of the murder of Gloria Steele, the poor family has waited and suffered for 33 long years, do not make them wait a second longer.

It was 4:45 and I remembered I was in a lot that closed at 6 and they locked up the court house at 5. So I ran across the street to see if I could get out of the lot after 6 since it looked like that was going to be the case. I paid my bill and was told I could get out at any time. I made my way back into the courthouse and up the stairs to an empty lobby. WHERE WERE THE NEWS CREWS??? I rushed into the courtroom with my heart pumping and was told the jury had a verdict and the court was going to resume soon. I positioned my self in the front row behind the defense table since I wanted to make sure that piece of shit seen me as he entered the courtroom. The first to be led in was the Steele family and they were seated with Gloria's daughter clenching a framed picture of her Mother. All of them were showing high signs of stress and anxiety with the up coming verdict about to be read, I'm sure most of you know exactly what I'm talking about because I was again on the verge of hyperventilating due to the same stress and anxiety I was feeling. Then I heard it, the sounds of those sweet chains clinking together and as I looked up I seen it walk through the door as he scanned the courtroom with his patented intimidating stare, but then his face all changed when again our eyes met. Without hesitation he looked at me with daggers shooting from his eyes and said to me "YOU PIECE OF SHIT" has his guards drew closer to him. I tried to control my self not to turn this into a circus to disgrace Gloria or her family in any way but the hatred reared it's head and I just blurted out "F*** You Watts!!" as he walked in front of me with our eyes just locked on each other with equal hatred for one another our banter continued with him calling me a "piece of shit" and me telling him to "go f*** himself". This at no time was loud or disruptive, just two old friends talking. The judge didn't seemed fazed by this at all and didn't do anything to stop it like he was aware of the hatred we both shared for each other. Watts was led to his seat as he shuffled due to his shackles that I'm sure he is totally use to by now. As he sat he turned his seat in my direction and we continued our stare down and mumbling to each other. At one point he mouthed "I'm going to kill you" and I returned with "Bring it on Watts, you piece of f 'ing shit f*** you!!" Then we got quite and we continued to stare into each others eyes, locked like radar locks onto a target. I could feel the anger swell up inside me and I'm sure he could read it in my eyes just as I was reading it in his. But then it happened, he broke the stare and turned and looked out the window in disgust. WAIT, WHAT JUST HAPPENED?? He couldn't take it any more?? I stared him down to where he wasn't comfortable no more. I just won at his game. I felt at that moment CLOSURE. I now made this piece of shit who brought so much pain to myself and all the poor families uncomfortable, aware that he was weak. He then turned to his attorney and whispered something to him and then they both started to laugh.

Now the the jury was brought in and seated. I looked at each of them just the way I looked at the jurors at Helen's trial, trying to get some kind of reading from each of them but again I felt nothing. So I just sunk my head into my hands and started to EXPRESS pray for God to lead there thoughts and feelings to the just verdict of GUILTY. The judge warned the courtroom of no outbursts when the verdict was read and he then asked the jury floor person if they had reached a verdict and she answered "Yes, we have." He then asked "What that verdict was." She took a deep breath that seemed to last forever and as she exhaled she stated softly "GUILTY". All I could hear where the sobbing of joy and the release of some of the pain coming from the bench where the Steele family were seating. Gloria's daughter clenched her Mothers picture with a grip only she could have as she wept openly, Gloria's frail Mother had tears pouring down her old and chiseled but lovely face as she just seen her daughters killer finally after decades finally pay for his evil doings. I then turned to look at Watts and I was SHOCKED to see what I was witnessing, he and his lawyer were both openly laughing at the verdict like two children. HOW DARE THEY LAUGH. I would expect something like that from Watts but from his f 'ing attorney. How can this professional, an officer of the court laugh at a verdict, a verdict that has been long over due, especially in front of the victims family. Then as the judged thanked the jury and they filed out Watts turned looked at me as he snickered. His guards helped him up and as he shuffled by me he again stated he wanted me dead and again I told him to go "F" himself and we held our glance till the door closed behind him. I turned and saw the Steele family leaving the court room as the news crews were scuffling to do live feeds outside. I rushed out the courtroom and saw they were getting into an elevator, I made it just as the door closed and with my hand I stopped it from shutting. it reopened with Gloria's father right there and I reached out my hand to him and he grabbed it and brought me in for an embrace as he wept. I then looked around the elevator as I saw all were weeping and I told them that we all love them. As they smiled and nodded the door closed and I was now standing alone, alone with a plethora of emotions that I had no idea of what to do with. This was the same feeling I had in November of 2004 as I left the courtroom after Helen's verdict, as the snow hit my face I asked myself "now what?"

But now the same confusion was back but this time I had some closure knowing Watts hated me, truly hated me. I know he daily thinks about me the same way I've been cursed to think about him. He knows what it is to truly hate someone for how much they have altered your life, haunted your dreams, your daily thoughts. I know I have along road ahead of me to work this all out but with each day it will get better knowing as I lay down each night and try to sleep, across the state my enemy is doing the same.....closure.